Archive for December, 2006

Vote buying

Thursday, December 28th, 2006

I hope everyone has had a great holiday season so far with the New Year approaching quickly. Recently free television sets are being handed out to the poor, poverty stricken persons across India so far 60,000 sets have been handed out with thousands more. Someone who received a television set said, “I will always vote for DMK.” Can I say vote buying?

The Christmas Elf Massacre

Sunday, December 24th, 2006

I received the following in a email forward. I thought I would share it.

The Christmas Elf Massacre


Buy me a beer if you want the story told
Of why I moved down South from the frost and cold.
Why I’m knee deep in therapy, liquor, and pills.
Why I’ve given up charity in lieu of cheap thrills.

Why I loathe mistletoe, fruitcake and bells –
And why I’ll celebrate Xmas when it freezes in hell.
You’ll never see this elf make angels in snow.
Hey thanks for the booze ? so I guess here it goes:

“Twas the night after Christmas in the North Pole
No creatures were stirring, not one lousy soul.
Santa’s house appeared eerily silent
But inside the fat man was hungry, was violent
.

This workshop of toys for kids of all ages
Was filled with elves quaking in cages.
Who woke up from their long winter’s naps
To find themselves snared in a devious trap.

Hours before I had been bingeing on nog
Passed out under the bed, I spied the whole saga.
I saw all my brothers rounded up in cages.
Sleepy victims of wicked midnight rampages.

Then what to my horrified eyes should appear
But a wild-eyed Santa pinching an elf by the ear.
Each little sprite shook in their tights and boots.
That this monster was Santa, no one could refute.

His size and his beard gave him away as St. Nick
His fangs and his scales made me quite sick
Blood seemed to stain his white fluffy trim
He was hunched, drooling, and disgustingly slim.

“Come little helper! Climb into my maw!”
He laughed, then casually ate the elf raw.
He greedily sucked the imp’s hide off the bone
I was awed! I was scared! I was truly alone!

Dainty elf paws clutched bars and cried
Drunk on deinal; confounded by why.
(He lost his count during his murderous spree
Thought he’d rounded up most, but forgot about me!)

His hunger was wracking his hunched-over frame
With a crippling appetite that didn’t know shame.
“Don’t eat us! We love you! Look at our faces!”
The doomed little elves made their sad cases

But Santa ignored them with a swipe of his fist
Pulled out some parchment and started a list:
“Silence, you nuggets ? I’m trying to think
Who to char-broil, who to blend into drink.

Who to dice, fillet, bake or panfry
Who to boil in soup, who to stuff in a pie”
These taunts seemed so strange to come from a man
Who held the dreams of children in his hands

Teeth full of gristle, he then sadly revealed
To his captive chorus of angel-faced veal,
That humans are greedy, petty, drunk on their vices.
And each Yuletide revel exacts gruesome prices

These prices are paid by the magical gnomes
Who hammer the toys that clutter up homes.
The payment’s a life ? one for each holiday sin.
Delivered by Santa, after his joyful break-ins.

Perhaps he was cursed by the Easter Bunny
Or an April Fool’s jester who thought it’d be funny.
The Great Pumpkin, Jack Frost or just maybe ?
That jealous and bratty New Years Eve baby.

Maybe it was a clue, how well we were fed
On cookies, cakes, lard balls and bread.
But our nature’s to love, not to distrust.
So we hugged the fat Claus’s and finished each crust.

Ignorant to what would soon transpire
We’d collapse in heaps by the crackling fire.
Expecting the old man to come flying back
And start making next years toys for his sack.

But how does he have enough sprites for his belly?
The final act of sorrow starts as fetal elf jelly.
That ferments inside his wife until it’s a broth
Filled with thimble-sized elves that surge forth like froth.

And these newborn elves, spawned pure from her womb.
Don’t understand: their workshop is really a tomb
Their dimples are gumdrops, they sneeze pixie dust.
Santa doesn’t hate them ? he’s cursed with a lust.

Elves are packed with vitamins A, C, and E
We’re awfully juicy, tart yet also fruity,
We go well with gravy and mayonnaise and toast
But casserole is how Santa likes us the most.

Barbequed, fricasseed, or flamb?ed
Sunny-side up, shish-ka-bobbed or flayed.
Prepared anyway, our flesh is quite delicious
And it’s not like toy-happy children will miss us.

Goodbye Carl, Zud, Sprinkles and Jan!
Blossom, Hortense, Cobweb, and Stan!
Julie, Miss Knickers, Fidget, and Ralph.
I’m sorry you’re dead, you wonderful elf.

A mouthed greased with fat, Santa then hibernated.
As Mrs. Claus squatted and grossly gestated
And all that is left of my cherubic siblings.
Was a pile of bells, curly-toed boots ? mostly elf things

So much for good cheer! But don’t shed a tear:
This gruesome cycle has happened for hundreds of years.
And as the fist to survive Father’s murderous rout
In a month I stopped hiding and got the hell out.”

Now I spend my days soaking under a sun like a yolk
(Yeah, I wish I’d have saved all or some of my folk)
I now have a tan where the rum’s in supply.
Sewing up flags for Captain Fourth of July.

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Should I . . .?

Tuesday, December 19th, 2006

I am considering about putting my name forward for the Young Liberal Party of Canada in British Columbia’s (YLCBC) executive for the position of Vice President for External Affairs. Should I?

Or is there another position from the following I’ll be better at:

YLC-BC Secretary
YLC-BC Vice-President -Communications
YLC-BC Vice-President - Finance
YLC-BC Vice-President - Membership
YLC-BC Vice-President - Organisation
YLC-BC Vice-President - Policy
YLC-BC Vice-President - Internal
YLC-BC Vice-President - External
YLC-BC Vice-President - Services
YLC-BC Vice-President - Operations

Senate Reform

Saturday, December 16th, 2006

Earlier this week Stephen Harper announced he would introduce legislation on Senate Reform which would allow Canadians to choose their preferred candidates of choice to represent their province or territory in the Senate, which will not require amending the country’s constitution.

The next step in Harper’s notion on this touchy subject to ‘achieve’ an ‘electable’ Senate is where the final choice is invested in the Prime Minister’s Office to abide by the current understanding of Senate appointments in accordance of constitutional law, the Prime Minister will appoint the most favoured Senatorial candidates to their ‘elected’ position to represent their ‘electors’ from across the country. You see, Stephen Harper is not my Prime Minister because his view is undemocratic and unconstitutional, and disfavours all of Canadians.

I have read several peoples’ views on CBC.ca’s Your View on the article that was published on December 13, 2006 on the topic currently being discussed, and made the following observation; Canadians are worried if having an electable Senate is a step forward towards ‘republicanization’ of the Canadian democracy, which in the end will adopt the likeness of the United States’ Government.

I do not believe adopting the governing system of the United States’ is for the Canadian democracy and that system is not workable here. There are several democracies around the world that have a bicameral parliamentary system (consists of two houses; upper & lower), where their Citizens vote for their own ‘Senators’. The following are; Czech Republic, Germany, and Belgium.

I believe Canada should have an electable, equal and effective Senate that’ll improve the democratic principles of our beloved country and is a step forward for Canadians to synch into modern times where appointments of non-elected persons to represent Canadians is just a toy dinosaur collecting dust in the constitutional closet. The question is simple; would the majority of Canadians agree with my logic?

I’ll be writing something short on constitutional reform sometime this weekend. Watch out.

Harper: Celebrates the Seasons

Thursday, December 14th, 2006

For $9.99 CAD you can purchase Steve’s Christmas Special CD, it’s a collectors item. Hits like, “All I want for Christmas is a Majority Government” & “I Saw Hot Mama Rona Kissing Peter Claus” are included in this one time special offer.

Do you have any other ideas of what hits should be on the CD? :P Let’s hear them.

Gilly to table motion of no confidence

Monday, December 11th, 2006

The Bloc Québécois’ leader Gilles Duceppe threatened to topple the Harper Government unless drastic change Canada’s primary role to the reconstruction effort. It is unclear if the opposition will vote in favour of the motion from Duceppe if it’s tabled.

Jack Layton appears to be poised to support the motion since he requested the Government to pull out Canadian troops by the end of February 2007. Stéphane Dion says he’ll wait to look over the motion of no confidence if the party will support the toppling of the government. So we may be heading into another election?

The government has to refocus our role in Afghanistan by submitting more of our resources in Afghanistan to the reconstruction and humanitarian efforts in Afghanistan, like building new schools, marketplaces, and hospitals to provide basic medical care for the Afghani people.

Parliament will not reopen SSM debate!

Thursday, December 7th, 2006

Prime Minister Harper’s evangelical supporters won’t be too thrilled this evening when they watch the six o’clock news. The Harper Government failed to reopen a debate on Same-Sex Marriage, 175-123. Peter MacKay (dog house Pete!), David Emerson (Boo!), John Baird, Jim Prentice, Lawrence Cannon, and the lovely Josée Verner were in favour of not reopening the debate. Finally an increase of common sense in the Conservative caucus.

Attacks on Dion

Wednesday, December 6th, 2006

The Conservatives have ‘viciously’ attacked Stéphane Dion after he won full support from fellow Liberals as our party’s new leader. The Conservatives stated that they plan on pinning the party’s shortcomings while serving at pleasure of Canadians in government. I think the Conservatives’ have made poor judgment on this decision because the Gomery Report has exonerated him from the sponsorship scandal in fact, Mr. Dion opposed ad scam and the sponsorship scandal altogether and didn’t want any part of it.

The Western Standard’s Ezra Levant stated in his Calgary Sun column: “When it comes to making decisions about the war on terror, and Canada’s role in Afghanistan, will Dion be unduly influenced by France, a country that has taken up the role of lawyer and arms dealer for every terrorist state in the world, even defending Saddam Hussein until the eve of his overthrow?”

I have a few questions for Mr. Levant: ‘Are you an idiot?’, ‘Have you not read a paper or watched television in the past several months?’, ‘Why are you questioning Stéphane’s loyalty to Canada?’.

I am going to take the words directly from his mouth; he’s a Canadian first, Quebecker second. Nor should you doubt him. Stéphane is so proud of being Canadian his pride floods whatever room he’s in – he truly is a Canadian. Monsieur Dion is not influenced by France; Canada is the only country in his heart.

The Canadian Government encourages oneself to embrace their heritage regardless of foreign nationality by taking on dual citizenship. The Harper Government recently reported that they are looking into cutting social programs to Canadians who hold dual citizenship and lived abroad in that country for a long period.

If the Conservatives’ were to enact this policy it will be found to be unconstitutional since in the Charter of Rights and Freedoms and our constitution, it dictates that all Canadians have the right to social programs. We are a nation of equality; however the Conservatives aren’t a party of equality, their fakers. They proved this by closing down 12 of 16 Status of Women Offices across the country and are unwilling to meet Arabic groups – despicable.

Funny

Sunday, December 3rd, 2006

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Convention Scarves & Shoulder Bag

Saturday, December 2nd, 2006

Attention Liberal Delegates, Alternates, Observers & Ex-Officios;

I did not go to convention, however I am looking for a shoulder bag and a green or red Dion scarf. Anyone willing to give the scarf and bag up for a reasonable amount of money. Please get in direct contact with me. My contact information will be on your right side of the screen if you are not viewing this post individually.

Thank You. I will be posting about the final results of the convention and what it means for the Liberal Party and the country.

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3rd Ballot Results

Saturday, December 2nd, 2006

Results

  • Stephane Dion: 1,782 votes, 37 per cent (17.8, 20.8)
  • Michael Ignatieff: 1,660 votes, 34.5 per cent (29.3, 31.6)
  • Bob Rae: 1,375 votes, 28.5 per cent (20.3, 24.1 per cent
  • - Bob Rae elimination from the third ballot.
    - Bob Rae releases his delegates without publicly endorsing another candidate for leadership.
    - Maurizo Bevilacqua endorses Dion.
    - Scott Brison endorses Ignatieff.

    The Anth Zone’s Predictions

    - Dion victory.
    - Highly unlikely for Iggy to recover from being dropped to second place.

    UPDATE

    - John Godfrey, Ken Dryden have endorsed Dion. CBC has reported that the majority of ex-officios and delegates of Rae’s have gone over to Monsieur Dion’s side. Good news.

    UPDATE 2

    - Ralph Goodale has endorsed Monsieur Dion.
    - Ignatieff Camp has been handing out pamphlet’s to delegates in line to vote to discredit Monsieur Dion. It is clear that Ignatieff plans on not uniting the party, and creates a shift between the two camps. According to the CBC, the pamphlet propagates that Monsieur Dion cannot take on Prime Minister Harper, and is not winnable. I know that’s a lie.

    2nd Ballot Results

    Saturday, December 2nd, 2006
     Results
     Michael Ignatieff
     1,481  31.6%
     Bob Rae  1,132  24.1%
     Stéphane Dion  974  20.8%
     Gerard Kennedy  884  18.8%
     Ken Dryden  219  4.7%

      - Ken Dryden eliminated from second ballot, supports Monsieur Bob Rae.
      - Gerard Kennedy crosses the convention floor to support Monsieur Dion.

    The Anth Zone’s Predictions on the Third Ballot

       - Bob Rae eliminated from the third ballot, supports Dion. Dion wins.
       - Ignatieff is eliminated from the third ballot, supports Rae. Rae wins.

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    1st Ballot Results

    Friday, December 1st, 2006
    Michael Ignatieff  1,412
     Bob Rae  977
     Stéphane Dion  856
     Gerard Kennedy  854
     Ken Dryden  238
     Scott Brison  192
     Joe Volpe  156
     Martha Hall Findlay  130

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    Comforting News

    Friday, December 1st, 2006

    I’m glad to see monsieurs Gerard Kennedy and Stéphane Dion have agreed to support one another if they’ve been dropped from the ballot. Although Kennedy surpasses Stéphane when it comes down to the delegate totals; the majority of delegates who haven’t chosen Dion as their first choice to lead the party say that he is their second choice to lead the party. There are reports that the Ignatieff Camp is bleeding out delegate support so I hope Dion has picked up a majority of that number. Cause my early Christmas wish is Mr. Ignatieff packing his bags for . . . Harvard. What, you thought I was going to write Stornoway? YA RIGHT!

    I would like to send kudos to Monsieur Paul Martin for his dedication to the party and bringing down the fence that placed our organization through vicious infighting between the Martin and Chrétien Camps. I do hope he becomes vocal for the party when Canada enters into election season.

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    © 2007 The Anth Zone


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